Your lyrics

[robmcgrail]

People definatly are to materialistic and self obsessive, but, thats how it is. Nothing is going to change that anytime soon. I hate the expectation layed on every little thing all the time, i hate the way people abuse common sence and morals for stupidity and fear. I hate the way i hate every little thing about this planet and love it and its beauty at the same time. I hate how i self loath and self destruct. But in the end... i love. And through self loathing and self destruction we might find some answers... or maybe, more importantly, forget the questions...

That was pretty much just a rant really...

[PenguinBoy]

^ meh lyrical none the less. Fair conclusion, "who needs reasons when you have heroin". Hehe, guffaw.

[all dressed up]

Originally Posted by robmcgrail

whats with your quote man, its been doing my head in for days. Its not even slightly deep. Stars dont have mirrors because they are big fat balls of gas burning. If they where infact a living soul, the last thing on thier mind would be finding a mirror, i think theyd be screaming in agony due to the shere heat not allowing them to become a nice solid state.

How can someone so devoid of imagination be a fan of damien rice?

[robmcgrail]

How can someone with such lack of humor. I was joking, i get what the saying was getting at, i was mearly making it literal for the purpose of humor.

[all dressed up]

Didnt really work then did it?

[robmcgrail]

No, your obviustly far to intellectually superior for me, and find the very thought of humor a complete waste of time, and as a result have spent none of your life understanding it.

Theres no need to make an arguement out of this man, just drop it ok. I was joking with BIG tim. He didnt take offecne to my comment, he must have picked up on the fact i was joking, i dont care what he has in his signiture, thats a stupid thing to concern myself with. And this had no reason for you to involve yourself in.

[Timeé]

Originally Posted by robmcgrail

No, your obviustly far to intellectually superior for me

4th class (/grade):

Circle the incorrect word(s ) in this sentence

[all dressed up]

Originally Posted by Timeé

4th class (/grade):

Circle the incorrect word(s ) in this sentence

[PenguinBoy]

These are some good lyrics, keepem comming

All together now:

"Devoid, devoid, devoid, of IM-AG-IN-AT-ION
la la la la la la la
Devoid, devoid, devoid, of HU-MO-OU-OU-OUR
la la la la la la la

Signature Big Tim, involve yourself
la la la la la la la
Fourth Grade Fourth class
la la la la la la la.

All dressed up for
Rob McGrail
All dressed up for
him,

LALALALALAL

CATTY CATTY
BITCHY BITCHY
EMPTY EMPTY
Over-reacty, over reacty;
CLARITY CLARITY!"


I don't like to brag, but i think i've just bettered anything damien rice has everr written (that IS a joke by the way; clarity!).

[robmcgrail]

Tell me if you're going to leave
So i can help pack your bag
All this lust lacks depth
On my shelf you sat and wept

Packaged up and left out
Weatherd and breatched
Lost and never reached
So tell me
If you're gonna leave

You keep me cold
With my faults numberd
Ask me seven times
And i'll answer in sums

Was it a beautiful statment
To walk away
Do i leave myself in your room
Or at least a small part that woulndt stay

The coffee stains
Have set in my dear
The marching orders
Still ring in my ear

You kept me cold
So my thoughts were numbed
Ask me seven times
Then tell me i'm lost
Ask me seven times
Then tell me i've lost...

[cille]

Originally Posted by PenguinBoy

These are some good lyrics, keepem comming

All together now:

"Devoid, devoid, devoid, of IM-AG-IN-AT-ION
la la la la la la la
Devoid, devoid, devoid, of HU-MO-OU-OU-OUR
la la la la la la la

Signature Big Tim, involve yourself
la la la la la la la
Fourth Grade Fourth class
la la la la la la la.

All dressed up for
Rob McGrail
All dressed up for
him,

LALALALALAL

CATTY CATTY
BITCHY BITCHY
EMPTY EMPTY
Over-reacty, over reacty;
CLARITY CLARITY!"


I don't like to brag, but i think i've just bettered anything damien rice has everr written (that IS a joke by the way; clarity!).

Very expressive, avantgarde'esque lyrics. Any recording available?

[Juzzza]

Originally Posted by bambi

I dont want my heart to beat
Unless you beat in time
I dont want to take a step
Unless your hand's in mine

I dont want to breathe again
Unless I breathe you in
I dont want my lips to move
Unless they touch your skin

I dont want to fall asleep
Unless you're holding me
I dont want open eyes
Unless its you I see

I dont want to weep again
Unless I cry for you
I dont want to lose this
Coz I'll die if we do

I dont want to grow old
Unless I am your wife
I dont want to live without you
Coz without you its not life

I dont want to live each day
Unless I've got you near
I dont wanna to go to heaven
Because heaven is right here


Something I wrote for my boyfriend

Really great!

[PenguinBoy]

Originally Posted by cille

Very expressive, avantgarde'esque lyrics. Any recording available?

Yes, but the whole song is pushed into inaudable frequencies. You're actually listening to it right now.

[cille]

Originally Posted by PenguinBoy

Yes, but the whole song is pushed into inaudable frequencies. You're actually listening to it right now.

oh, thank god. i thought i was developing tinnitus.

[This has got to die]

Right guys, i want your HONEST opinion on this, its a song i am kind of attempting about my ex who lets just say was very uptight and well not very forthcoming would lock things up etc

anyway

The skys are glinting
And I know iv’e been here before
Dreaming in another drunken haze
Craving your touch, or just your gaze
Your lips upon my ears, will stop the tears

Its hard, but I know our roads are broken
No words to heal them either our love was just a token? OR No words to heal them either?
No actions to make you see
That we were free, freerer than you and he.

Did I ever get my chance?
Where was my fourth wish?
Sat on my bed again, all alone again
Head buried inbetween my knees, searching for a soul
Hung by your love, again.
Oh please just let me in.

Don’t even know what I want today
Wishing to be a child in a glade
Kiss touch was just a game you and I use to play
Now it means to much
Even to touch

Just give me a day
A second would do

I gave you my soul
You gave me your lies
But I’m still open (Like a fool)
So give me your keys

Meh looking over it i want to redit two lines really but will leave them for now.

Already got the first verse of another song.>

Waking up, starring at the window, just another grey day
Until I roll over, and see why I stay
Enough beauty to light a black hole
Justifies why I fight for my existence


We will seee.

[Juzzza]

Hey, This has got to die, I like it. I think there is some good stuff in there, I especially like the 'so give me your keys'... really nice imagery and analogy.

I've said it many times that most lyrics can come across as cheesy or cliche without the context of the melody and as part of the tune in its entirety, so it only has to work for you, the songwriter. However, I think the desire to have the verses rhyme, weakens the lyrics here... 'gaze' and 'daze' for example just reads as there because it fits rather than enhancing the story in the song.

One thing you've got, which is priceless, is the ability to create visual stories with words.

[This has got to die]

Yeah I dont like trying to make it Ryme it seems very unatrul I have said that before!

Thank you very much for getting back to me and for the kind words, I have finished the other set of lyrics just got to get someone to sing them now, hopefully I can I ahve someone in mind just got to catch him online!

This song came to me quite quick in the end and again I would like your honest opinion this will probably be the last one I write for a little while thank you again.

Waking up, starring at the window, just another grey day
Until I roll over, and see why I stay
Enough beauty to light a black hole (Like a angel man)
Justifies why I fight for my existence

If you and I are a crime
Then I’ll let you fly
Just don’t let me see you cry
‘Cause we have gone to far

If I’m not able
Then we’re not stable
So lets not waste time
To worry would be our biggest crime

Time stands still as you turn on your heal
Spinning a web of lie and deceit (She’s butiful man)
Fogging my mind and I’m in your grip
Tighter than my last E trip

Your gone or was it me?
Im not sure but its over
Were alone lonelier than can be said
The spotlight shined upon my little head

You’ve gone home to your master
Sure your happier
You’re my addiction
My heroine
I’m your inconvenience
The biggest mistake, a habit you cant break

If I’m not able
Then we are not stable
So lets not waste time
To worry would be our biggest crime

What’s the point of this line?
Sitting in
Lying in
No one to help me begin

But your light keeps me sane
Helps me when your alone
Ticking clock dictates are time
So lets not fly
Stay together ever with me
And forget his touch
His kiss upon your cheek
‘Cause I know you need more
Am I the one?
Or just a thorn in your side?
Prune me and you will be free!
In time you will see
I was your Suitor

Some people have been confused by what "suitor" means, its my understanding that it means Prince Charming :P

[elerossë]

hi all, here's my contribution to this cool thread


Time leads us apart
And hardens our hearts
Makes us see no difference
Between our present and our past
We prayed our luck could last
But was there any chance
To break through the gates
It’s hard to simulate
And we should never try
To change our destiny
And shape what cannot be
Only to satisfy
Our need to understand
And simplify an end
We just cannot bear
The loss and the curse
The oblivion and worse
How must we prepare
Our cracked little bones
To rot and break alone
On a cold October day
Come, we’ll find a safer road
Though we’ve always been told
There was no other way.
Now we must run and search much higher
To find what we could become
Cause we are blessed, now more than ever
And our time will surely come

[audity]

^ Fantastic work...I'd write a full review, but my parents are in the car waiting for me...

[cille]

^^ I really digged it too!!

[elerossë]

Thanks a lot Audity and Cille! I'm glad you like it.

[This has got to die]

A song that I am working on.

Take my hand
My land
My home and my bread
My mum, her aunt but not my soul
You cant

Our soil has gone
The fires settle
Babies cry, scream, amongst the carcasses
To young to see
This is their future for years to come

On the news this fair day
For a week or two
Forgotten by the next
Still, we walk alone
You can lie, pretend to care, then go back to happy times

Live 8?
Whats that?
Where you, me and everyone felt good about ourselves
While my family got set upon
Raped and pillaged
Come to us
We don’t want your money
We need your help
Solid hands
Not funds to make him upstairs a new palace

[audity]

Originally Posted by This has got to die

A song that I am working on.

Take my hand
My land
My home and my bread
My mum, her aunt but not my soul
You cant

Our soil has gone
The fires settle
Babies cry, scream, amongst the carcasses
To young to see
This is their future for years to come

On the news this fair day
For a week or two
Forgotten by the next
Still, we walk alone
You can lie, pretend to care, then go back to happy times

Live 8?
Whats that?
Where you, me and everyone felt good about ourselves
While my family got set upon
Raped and pillaged
Come to us
We don’t want your money
We need your help
Solid hands
Not funds to make him upstairs a new palace

A song about Live 8 –– I'm speechless

[This has got to die]

Its not a song ABOUT live 8.

Live 8 is in it, but that was mainly my personal feelings towards what I felt was nothing more than a publicity boost for most people...

[Timeé]

youre ****in right. a guilt relief trip.

[This has got to die]

Yeah like the BANDS that came out you know the white ones, and people would have loads on their arm to show how much they cared? Funny I don't see many now really.

[cestoz]

i dont know what just happened here,
youve torn a page out of your book,
the one you wrote my name on
does this mean youre moving on?

you said you'd never wash your hands again,
after you had held mine
you said youd never wash your hands again,
why did you change your mind?

could you still feel me when he held you, feel me deep inside
so deeply i once was, back when you had nothing to hide


im not sure what just happened here,
you've tore a picture off the wall,
the one that had my face on
does this mean youre moving on?

you said youd never wash you face again,
those lips i kissed upon
you said youd never wash your hands again,
now you seem to have forgotten..

could you still taste me when he kissed you? remember me and my old lips?
so deep and deeper still, you took all i had to give..

was it so easy to replace me
retrace the path i found to find you..
passed your lips, your skin to your heart
does its every beat not still remind you...

i dont know what just happened here
you tore a page out of my book
the one you drew a heart round
your name and mine,
i thought everything was fine...


'the "could you still..." bits, the chorus, is so obviously copying damo on the new album 'do you brush your teeth before you kiss' etc, so will have to be changed, but i still kind of think it has some potential...

[This has got to die]

I like that allot. Very nice writeing, love the first verse.

[audity]

Originally Posted by cestoz

i dont know what just happened here,
youve torn a page out of your book,
the one you wrote my name on
does this mean youre moving on?

you said you'd never wash your hands again,
after you had held mine
you said youd never wash your hands again,
why did you change your mind?

could you still feel me when he held you, feel me deep inside
so deeply i once was, back when you had nothing to hide


im not sure what just happened here,
you've tore a picture off the wall,
the one that had my face on
does this mean youre moving on?

you said youd never wash you face again,
those lips i kissed upon
you said youd never wash your hands again,
now you seem to have forgotten..

could you still taste me when he kissed you? remember me and my old lips?
so deep and deeper still, you took all i had to give..

was it so easy to replace me
retrace the path i found to find you..
passed your lips, your skin to your heart
does its every beat not still remind you...

i dont know what just happened here
you tore a page out of my book
the one you drew a heart round
your name and mine,
i thought everything was fine...


'the "could you still..." bits, the chorus, is so obviously copying damo on the new album 'do you brush your teeth before you kiss' etc, so will have to be changed, but i still kind of think it has some potential...

It does a potential –– a lot of it...
Wonderful imagery...
"you said you'd never wash" lines are excellent...I know what you mean

The books lines remind me of a song I wrote recently

[cestoz]

hey, thanks a lot for the comments, and i came on here expecting to delete it after having it being ripped to shreds! :-)